Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Transcript for my article: Talking to the Dead

(This is the full transcript of the reading. go to the article for shorter version)
4/4/12 Psychic Reading

During a reading, my client’s deceased father  began speaking to me:
“Don’t make it darker for yourself,” he told her.  “To Spare yourself despair you create  despair in the beginning.  Because you think negative things, you make the (scope?) spokes too small.”  What I get is “widen the scope.”

Your father is tapping you on the shoulder and he’s saying, “Wake up, Wake up!”
The life he’s showing me is big and bright and beautiful. It isn’t small and dark and rejecting.
Does that make sense? Yeah, she says through tears.

He’s showing me a sunrise, he’s showing me big. What he’s showing me as far as X (the man who recently broke her heart) is like…it’s small around him because he’s still so substance-addicted that it’s dark in his cave, and when you go into that cave, it’s dark in there.

But you’re making up, what I’m getting from your dad is tell you to stop making up stuff about rejection for you. If I’m quoting your dad…ooh it’s giving me a headache…if I’m quoting your dad, it’s like he’s pushing me to that sunrise he’s pushing me to seeing the world as huge and big and “I don’t want her in a cave, I don’t want her in those places. I don’t want her to think the temporary problems are the rest of her life. I don’t want her to think that way because that is not true.”

I’m getting from him the sense like there’s a history on this earth, like his history, your mom’s history…it feels little in comparison to what he keeps showing me which is the sunrise, which is huge, like a huge…you know, all the other is like little things, almost like the way we have websites, or facebook or pinterest that we pin these things on top of which is really a huge world, they’re little pieces that we think…what I’m getting from him is as if I thought facebook was the whole world, or if I thought pinterest was the whole world and he’s saying “no, no, no, those are just little things that are in the world that people create. But the world is really huge, it’s almost like he’s showing me sort of like the sunrise over Isreal, and you know…these big places where life is so much bigger and so much better. Don’t think that facebook or pinterest is your whole life. They’re just little portals into little portals.

What feels best with him is when I go back to that big big sunrise.  And it’s just like…He’s saying to me…tell you to focus there.  That’s your meditation.  He’s also saying he’ll meet you there.  “I’m there with you.  You’re not alone. You’re not alone.” 

(He refers to another issue with someone in her life) This is all temporary and not to mistake it for who you are or for your real life.  Don’t make those mistakes of confusing what the real world is because the real world is so much bigger and better and don’t assume  that you deserve the craziness of X.  He thinks X is like a joker, like a joker in the deck but don’t think that’s the whole deck. It’s an interesting card but it’s not the whole deck.  It’s part of the game but not the game itself.

If you know nothing else, you’re supposed to know that X is lucky to have a little spot in your life but that’s the best he can do is have spots in people’s lives but he’s not the whole…he’s not the play.  But he’s so intense that it’s really easy to mistake…get caught up, it’s like when your sweater gets caught against…it’s like if you had a mohair sweater and the mohair gets caught against something and it pulls you.. it’s a pull but it’s not enough of…it gets stuck on things but you have to disentangle.  And keep knowing that you’re moving forward to something bigger. It’s your play, you get to be the star.

He’s giving me the sense that you’ve been around since the dawn of time, and that’s a long time for a soul to be around, that’s a lot of lifetimes to soak up stuff.  And he’s saying to tell you not to forget who you are and how big your soul is.
Not to mistake the situation comedy, the tv show, the game, whatever it is, not to mistake that…to remember the sunrise that he’s showing me.  Like ancient Jerusalem, kind of thing, and what he’s saying to me is that its bigger than Jerusalem, it’s bigger than all of that. Those are all places in the bigger soul.
It makes him happy to think you understand that he’s right here with you, that he’s…the entertainment.  If you don’t like what X is doing, or not doing then change the channel.  That he’s just one little channel and he’s a telemundo (is that the word?) story. You can always turn on that channel but that doesn’t mean you forget…that you….

What I get from your dad is this big resonance to remember who you are, remember how big your soul is.  And that a lot of the day-to-day stuff is boring, and it’s tedious, remember there’s this whole world that you can sense… there’s this whole world that out there that’s so much bigger and so much grander and we’re on this precipice in our world of having to break through and it feels like crashing down a lot of times, it feels heavy and it feels crazy and it feels tiring and it feels…just something or other…disarming?..dis..something.  …Don’t, don’t, don’t…what? Don’t lose your footing, don’t lose your sense that I’m with you. Don’t lose your sense of humor.  The biggest thing is… Don’t mistake these little character studies for the whole play, for the whole process.

Your father is giving me the sense that he’s one of your soul mates. And of course I’m not going to leave you, of course I’m still with you, but you should see it on this side. It’s so big….the word big doesn’t even describe it, it’s so big and so grand and so beautiful.

It’s sort of like where do we get TV shows like Bewitched, where do we get the idea of facebook, where do we get these ideas…because they’re little tiny tiny portals reflecting…something, like something so much bigger but we can’t grasp. Be he’s saying you can grasp it. And he has been guiding you to people, he’s been guiding you, so don’t think you’re not guided. He’s telling me you have lots of guides in your life.

He also feel like X was not a mistake but where he gives me the mistake is if you think  you’re small or rejected or not enough, or any of that stuff, then you’re in the…detritius?...the..the  something…of X and what he creates, which is he spins a web and it’s dark because he has a lot of dark substance in his energy. That dark substance pulls people down. It doesn’t  make his parents happy. It’s dark. It’s not all he’s capable of but it’s the telemundo drama he’s invested himself in.

I also get…don’t wish to be in that drama. What I get from your dad is he keeps showing you that sunrise so it’s like so you’re not [stuck wondering] how do I be in this drama? How do I not be in this drama? it’s like…put your energy into the sunrise, remember who you are, remember who’s with you, remember that you’ve been around since the dawning of time and that’s a long time to be around, it’s a big stretch for the soul to deal with the darkness that we’re going through as a world right now and at the same time know what the dawning of life (light?) is and know it’s like holding up a monolith…it’s big it’s big it’s big. Don’t forget and think that you’re small and have to play small. You don’t hold everything up by yourself.

If you could see what he’s showing me…this vast vast sunrise, and not to doubt it.  Not to doubt it for me and not to doubt it for you. It’s like, listen you guys, step into this next state (space?) because it’s like the old world is crumbling and people are going every which way with it and you can’t do that. You signed on for something bigger. You signed on to remember who you are, and to remember who we are. And to remember there’s a bigger process and I don’t care if you believe it or you don’t believe it. You know the truth in your soul. And that’s what you have to keep going to.  Other people don’t necessarily access it as much as you do.

And that’s the craving you’re feeling.  That’s the craving that’s going to look like it’s X or it’s going to look like it’s A (another person in her life) it’s going to look like it’s this or it’s that.  But keep going back that you’ve been here since the dawn of time and there’s no substitute for that.  That’s the biggest…there’s no meal as filling or as rich as knowing who you are and that you’re here from the dawn of time. Because  people don’t know what that means…but apparently that really means something.
“Questions?” I ask her, kind of laughing…”That’s what I get.”  I’m laughing because it felt as if I were holding such a high state of being, as if a powerful light were shining through me.

“All right,” she says, sounding disappointed or deflated. “I mean, you know, of course you have to focus on the bigger picture. It’s hard being human sometimes.”  It sounds to me as if she thinks she has to apologize for the upset she’s feeling.  (This turns around for her later, as often happens once someone has sat with the reading.)

“Don’t break it down to focus on the bigger picture,” I tell her.  “I know that’s sounds like the logical step. But I’ll tell you what it feels like in me…it doesn’t feel like focusing…maybe I said that [word], I don’t even know what I said, to tell you the truth.

It feels like opening, opening to the bigger picture, opening to who you are. What you’re doing with X is like you’re closing..looking through a small…you know how we’re supposed to look at venus or the sun, or whatever it is, you cut a hole in something and you look at the reflection.

And what he’s saying to me is that’s how you’re seeing yourself if you’re trying to see through what you think X sees you as.  What I get from your father is …what you’re looking at when you look at X or your life, it’s like you’re looking through a little pinhole and you’re thinking that’s all of life. Your logical human mind is, okay well that means focus on the big picture

But what I get from him is that the big picture is in you.  So it’s literally like the soul has it and we keep shutting it down because that’s what  our logical mind thinks is life.  So it’s literally a breaking down inside yourself. You can’t make it happen but it’s breaking down into what is happening. 

And all the X stuff and all that. You don’t yet know when looking back what it’s going to be for you. Because your human mind is going to tell you it’s one thing but his otherworldly mind is telling me there’s a much bigger picture you’ll be given but you can’t figure out.

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